Protected: Assypants for King D
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Dr. Nutmeg’s Fake News for January 2019
Welcome to the Fake News. I’m Dr. Nutmeg reporting LIVE from Planet MyAmi on January 8, 2019. In today’s Fake News, I am not smart. I have no skills. I am ugly. My hair sucks. Nobody loves me. I am 14 years old. I have traits of Borderline Personality Disorder. And sometimes I’m a little …
Dr. Nutmeg’s Femmebots Go to AnimeNYC
Welcome to the Fake News! I’m Femmebot 7.0 reporting LIVE from AnimeNYC at the Javits Center! We interrupt this so-called Livestream with REALITY – I’m Femmebot 3.0,and we are NOT live, it’s already been a few weeks since the three-day AnimeNYC convention happened, sometimes news needs to simmer and bake in the operating system before …
Every Month Is a Reminder of a Reality That Never Came to Be
A menstrual rant by Dr. Nutmeg……….. Yes. It’s that time of the month. Extra salt. Melted hot chocolate at the Union Square Christmas fair. Fat pants. Guinness. And the realization that I forgot, again, to get pregnant. I’ve forgotten now…hmmm. How many times? 30 years x 12 = 360 times. At this juncture, the stats …
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Dr. Nutmeg’s Femmebots Navigate New York’s Health Insurance Exchange
It’s that time of year when we stop creating animations that don’t make any sense or Fake News reels that don’t make anyone laugh, and turn to the glamorous world of building a business infrastructure. We’ve got exactly one week and two days to enroll in a health insurance plan. The big question we’ve been …
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Fake News Report on Brazil
Welcome back to the Fake News, galera, I’m Femmebot 5.0 reporting live from Sampa (Sao Paolo), Brazil. We are voting this weekend in our most important election of the 21st century. Gente, we must NOT allow another populist to become president, it’s starting to look like the 1984 George Orwell predicted. Nesse malandro Bolsonaro is …
Dear Urban Mermaid
This post is an advice column for people who live below sea level. Dear Urban Mermaid: While lifeguarding for only one hour, 8am-9am, the pool was packed with four swimmers per lane. Some of them got angry with me for trying to direct them into lanes suited to their pace. I found out from the …
Adult Swim Pitch – Week of July 19
After the guys at Adult Swim said The Femmebots was “really cool” but they “didn’t laugh a ton,” I’ve been re-editing older episodes, which I think were funnier. I cut out the scenes that were just me experimenting with the animation software, and replaced them with the grounding scene of Dr. Nutmeg’s therapy couch for robots. In …
18 Things to Do When You’re 42 and Not a WifeBot or MomBot…
1. You wake up when you want, at different times throughout the week… 6:35am 8:05am 11:00am 2. You go to bed when you feel like it. 3am 9pm 11pm Not at all. 3. You walk random dogs. 4. You run away from boys (who chase you more than when you were in your 20s). 5. …
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Mammogram Machines
I forgot to bring the form from my doctor to the lab. They say I can’t put my boobs inside the machine without the form. So now I have to wait. Ugh. Too many things to remember in the 21st Century. Why can’t I download the form from my brain? Isn’t my mobile phone my …